Vitamins for the soul 

What would your life be like if you knew a way to keep yourself and others in a good mood most of the time?  My mentor and life coach, Carol McCall, taught me one of the secrets of lifting the spirits of those around me and of myself as well.   

The secret lies in a simple communication tool called acknowledgment.  Through this  tool, you can liberally sprinkle good will on all of your relationships.  Acknowledgment begins with letting others know that you appreciate something they said or did.  True  acknowledgment, however, takes this appreciation a step further.  

The key ingredient, beyond merely expressing appreciation, involves speaking about the contribution that the other’s actions or words have made to you.  It entails sharing not only that you appreciate what people have said or done, but also how their specific actions or words have enriched your life.    

For example, suppose a colleague at work hands in a project or a letter on time.  Rather than merely saying “Thanks,” you can say, “I really appreciate your getting that to me on time [the appreciation part]. It means that I can now complete my part of the project and we can all get paid sooner [the contribution part]!”  

You may have noticed that it takes more words to get across this message.  By taking the extra time and effort, you let the other person know how his actions have affected you.  This specificity makes a heart to heart connection with the other person that a mere “thanks” does not accomplish.  In this connection lies the secret to an energy surge that is experienced by both giver and receiver. 

I noticed an increase in the cooperation that I received from my children when I began to use this tool with them.  After my youngest son would do a chore, for example, I learned to say to him,  “Paul, I appreciate that you did the dishes.  It really lightened my workload and gave me time to get my project done.”   

This acknowledgment let Paul know how his action made my life better.  It caused him to feel more inclined to help out the next time I made a request of him. 

 Acknowledgments are like vitamins for the spirit and supplements for the soul.  Give out liberal daily doses to everyone in your life. The MDR (minimum daily requirement) is three per day.  I prescribe working up to ten as tolerance increases.  

Then notice how the atmosphere becomes charged with positive vibes.  Notice, too, how much more zest, joy and satisfaction you add to your life!  Keep practicing this tool until it becomes a way of life for you. 

Remember that practice makes permanent. 

Dr. Marta is a Life Coach and Doctor of Psychology practicing in the Verde Valley.  To contact her, write her at martadelsman@juno.com or P.O. Box 1312, Cottonwood, AZ, 86326.  Visit Carol McCall’s website at www.listeningprofitsu.com.